May 24, 2003

Not much to post about currently. Had fun last night at Joe's Crab Shack ("Adams party of 16, ruba-dub-dub, it's time for some grub!"), followed by wandering around the streets of Jax Beach out of sheer boredom, then putt-putt at Adventure Landing, followed by cruisin' the streets of Jax beach out of sheer boredom, and finally Steak-n-Shake in Regency. Good times. That's about all. Hopefully I'll have something more interesting to post about tomorrow after church. Later.

May 22, 2003

To those of you who know me, and maybe I don't speak to you as often as you think I should, I apologize! If I come off as rude, I also apologize! (TR, if you're reading this, you know I'm talking to you!) Sorry, but being social is not something I've ever been really good at!! Communicating, sure. Being social, no. My mom and one of my brothers got extra doses of that gene... I think I got the short end of the stick, as they say, which I have never thought was a really great phrase. How is one end of a stick shorter than the other??? Anyway, just wanted to make my apology open-ended in case I have offended anyone else along the course of life. Please remember that listening is often just as important, if not more, than talking. Later.
"Song 4 Tricia (princes and frogs)" by, of course, superchick (an important note is that this one is sung by the guys of the group! yes, there are guys in superchick!)

You hate them, that's what you say, and I understand how you feel that way. all girls dream of fairy tale, but what you've got's like a used car salesman, trying to conceal what's wrong behind the smile and the song, and I'm not saying that boys are not like that. but I think you should know that some of us will grow because...

all princes start as frogs and all gentlemen as dogs. just wait till it's plain to see what we're growing up to be. some frogs will still be frogs, and some dogs'll still be dogs. some boys will become men, just don't kiss us till then!

(that's it. really. that's the whole song. no repeats or anything.)
(if a post shows up twice on here, sorry about that. had some tech. difficulty)
Wow. You can be in the midst of throwing yourself a pity-party, but as soon as you cry out to God for help instead of just feeling sorry for yourself, He intervens. Honestly, I was having a really bad day today, but I poured it all out to God, and before I was even done, the phone rang. Just a friend calling to ask me to hang out, but it's exactly what I needed. God always knows what I need. Sometimes I think I know, but I'm usually wrong! God never gets it wrong, though. Pretty stinkin' amazing. Here's a note from my Bible that I thought was pretty cool. It's talking about 1Kings 17:10.

"In a nation that was required by law to care for its prophets, it is ironic that God turned to ravens (unclean birds) and a widow (a foreigner from Jezebel's home territory) to care for Elijah. God has help where we least expect it. He provides for us in ways that go beyond our narrow definitions or expectations. No matter how bitter our trials or how seemingly hopeless our situation, we should look for God's hand of care. We may find his providence in some strange places!"

Cool. It's good to know that God is not limited by my "narrow defititions" of Him. I'm glad He always goes above and beyond what I expect or could ever hope for.
Random thought of the day: I love how you can change your clothes and hair and you're practically a different person! Okay, not a different person, but at least a different image. Like today, strangers would swear I'm a punk-rocker! Yesterday, I was a simple, plain "church girl," for lack of a better description. Lots of fun! Later.

May 21, 2003

Ya ever feel all alone in a room full of people? I feel like that's the story of my life! I know it's just one of those things that satan uses to get me down, and I also know it's one of those things I need to get over. It's pretty tough to get over at times, though. All I can say is that I have no idea how non-Christians ever cope in life! Christ is my only source of strenght. He is all that get's me through. Here's the lyrics to "One and Lonely" (of course, by superchick!). I think only parts of it apply to me, but it's a great song anyway.

It's not like they meant to hurt me, watchin' tv, checking Britney, televised, my guy's checking out her thighs, and I roll my eyes and sigh. It's not like I even need to be competing with unreality, tv fantesy, not for a smart girl like me.

some days it's hard to be a one girl revolution. sometimes I have good days, and it's good to be me. sometimes I get the best of insecurity. and it's quite alright to be the one and only, but today I feel like the one and lonely.

It's not that I don't know beauty is only skin deep, just the skin I'm in, not the girl within, but one imperfection takes away my grin. it's not that I think I'm ugly, but acne throws me for a backslide, I won't go outside, think I can't hide how I feel inside.

some days it's hard to be a one girl revolution. sometimes I have good days, and it's good to be me. sometimes I get the best of insecurity. and it's quite alright to be the one and only, but today I feel like the one and lonely.

we all have bad hair days, those nothing-good-about-me days, we just keep moving on cause they'll be gone and we'll still be here going on. we have our yesterdays, no-lunch-cause-our-jeans-don't-fit days, we just keep moving on cause they'll be gone and we'll still be here going on.

sometimes I have bad days and it's hard to be me. sometimes I get brought down by security. and I have my days where I'm the one and lonely, but today I choose to be the one and only.

you just might get it! That's something I've been learning from the Children of Israel in the book of Numbers. First, as I posted about before, they "wished" for meat to eat instead of manna. Actually, they complained and begged for it. So, God gave them meat till they were sick of it. Later on, they say to God, "we would rather die in this wilderness than travel any further." So, God once again grants their wish. He tells them that they will stay in the wilderness for 40 years and will die there.

In the midst of our complaining, we often ask for things without thinking about what it is that we're really asking for, or the consequences of having those things. I've been reminded this week to stop my complaining and be thankful for what God is doing in my life. And when I keep asking for something, it better be what I really want! I've decided it's often better just to ask for God's will to be done, rather than asking for specifics. He has a much better idea of what we need than we do! For that matter, He has a much better idea of what we WANT than we do! We think we know what we want... until we have it; then it turns out not to be what we wanted after all. Let Him have control. And, be careful what you wish for!
Okay, yes, as a matter of fact, yesterday was a total Superchick day! "Karaoke Superstar" was my car CD of choice. And then last night I dl'ed a couple of the songs from their new CD, "Last One Picked"... they're AWESOME! Personal fav's: "Song 4 Tricia (Princes & Frogs)" and "Highschool." I'm sure I'll get around to posting some lyrics soon! I also liked "Hero," "One and Lonely," and "I Belong to You." Okay, so I like all Superchick songs! They're just so REAL! I mean, they're about real issues that real people deal with. None of that my-life's-so-great nonsense! Later!

May 20, 2003

If anybody's interested in getting me a super-early birthday gift, here's my wish list! I'm dying for some new CDs: new superchick one, new relient k one, new(er) ginny owens one, and about a hundred various worship CDs are on my list, too. I'm totally kidding... I don't want anybody to buy me stuff! (as if you really would have!) But I've got some serious CD shopping to do this summer! Gimme the heads-up if anybody has a super great sale or anything! Later.
"Help Me Out, God" by Superchic[k]

help me out, God, I need a little something, turn the brights on, I can't see where I'm going, cause I don't know when things'll work out just fine, or if this road we're on leads us up or is leading me on down to my wishing well, where I might drown, oh I might drown, cause I CAN'T SWIM WITHOUT YOU, GOD, help me out, God, I need a little something, hold my hand, so I know that I'm not falling down or spinning round, or am I really just fine, is this vertigo I feel just simply fear or maybe real, it's a long way down, and I might fall, and I might fall, cause I CAN'T STAND WITHOUT YOU, GOD, help me out, God, I need a little something, just enough so I don't lose hope before morning comes cause in the sun things'll work out just fine, but this night's been extra long, I fear I won't make it to the dawn, cause the night is dark and I might doubt, and I might doubt, cause I CAN'T HOPE WITHOUT YOU, GOD, just enough for today, get me through till tomorrow
You know it's a good day when you leave from getting your hair cut and you're not crying, then you have the world's best sweet tea and the perfect grilled cheese sandwich for lunch. (Not to be confused with a "sand wedge," Joy & Reed!)

God keeps bombarding me with this Egypt/desert/Promised Land topic over and over again. It's incredible how much it comes up. I guess I'm just being taught to have faith. Not that life is horrible right now, or anything like that. Just a kinda weird time, for some reason. But regardless, God's showing me things currently.
Ok, posted this verse Sunday, but here it is again in another version.

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'"
Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

May 19, 2003

It poured last night. I love sleeping in the rain! It was great. Starting to storm again now, so I won't stay online long. Remember to enjoy the rain as well as the sunshine!
"God's will is what you would chose for yourself if you had sense enough to chose it."
-Bro. Keith Russell

May 18, 2003

Church was phenominal! First, in Sunday school, Mrs. Linda mentioned something about the Elders that surround the throne of God who continually cry, "Holy, holy, holy." She mentioned how she origionally thought that sounded awefully boring. She went on to explain, however, that she has come to believe that they keep crying "holy" because each time they look at God they see a new aspect of Him, which causes them to proclaim, once again, God's holiness. In other words, God is so overwhelming that they are at a loss for anything else to say. Mrs. Linda went on to say that God cannot be contained by our vision of Him, but without a vision of some sort we will perish, as the Bible puts it. A final thing from Sunday school is that it was the third time for me in like half a week that the verse Jeremiah 29:11 came up. "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end." I always think it's amazing how much God can coordinate things that come into our lives, like the recurrence of a single verse multiple times in one week, just so that you will know He is talking to you.

On to the church service. First of all, I absolutely love singing in the choir. It's so much fun. This morning we did a song called "We will arise" which is also phenominal. It's a fun song with a great message. I, however, didn't know the song at all! The choir did the song on Easter, and although I was at Westside on Easter, I didn't sing it because I had been away at school. So, luckily, the media guys were with it this morning and had the words on the screen for us... praise God! Secondly, Bro. Keith is incredible. Aside from his overwhelming passion for God's Word, he has this uncanny ability to alliterate anything, as Quinn often points out to me. Well, this morning topped them all! The title was "The Prominent Pitfalls in Peter's Plunge" and the points were 1.)Pride, 2.)Prayerlessness, 3.)Passiveness,& 4.)Peers. Incredible! It was also an awesome message. It's great to leave church knowing that God has spoken to you.