May 22, 2006

thoughts on love...

Most people, if asked, would probably agree that love is wonderful. But if asked to define it, I'm not so sure that the average person would have a really clear idea of what they think love is. Here's what I think, and please be aware that there is probably much more I could say as to my opinion of love, but this is the abbreviated version. First of all, love isn't just a feeling. Sure, it might start that way, with mere attraction or a crush or whatever you want to call it, but for it to be considered "love" in my opinion, it must move pretty significantly far beyond that. Love is a deep care for another person, but not a type of caring that can be swayed by feelings or emotions. This is a choice. You choose to care about the other person. You choose to care, even if you don't "feel" like caring sometimes. You make the decision (in the case of marriage) to care for them for the rest of your life. If you follow the idea of love that God laid out in 1 Corinthians 13, you also decide that the other person is more important than yourself, and their benefit is more important than your own. You decide that you will do everything it takes to benefit them above yourself. You decide to commit yourself to them unconditionally. If you truely make this kind of decision, I don't believe you can ever then not love that person. I guess all of this comes from me working in a law office where I daily hear about people's divorce cases, and how two people who used to be "in love" now hate each other with a passion. I just can't comprehend that. It doesn't make any sense to me. It blows my mind to think that people can make such a dramatic shift. If I can be so bold, though, I would venture to say that most of these people confused an emotional attraction for love. I have a hard time believing that people who have made an every-fiber-of-your-being commitment to one another would so easily reverse their decision to the polar opposite. This goes along with the idea of pre-nuptual agreements. People who do those, in my opinion, already have the idea in mind that they are not going to stay with the person they are marrying. It can't be real completely-committed love if you know that you aren't going to stick with it. Okay, so now I'm rambling. I don't know how many people would agree with me on this stuff, but those are my thoughts today. Leave me a comment and tell me what you think. Feel free to disagree if you want. Peace.

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